Libertine club: practical guide for beginners

The libertine universe, mysterious to many, is often seen as a world apart. Preconceived ideas feed apprehension, but the reality is clear: respect, security and courtesy predominate. Interactions are spontaneous, with freedom of expression of desire. The key? Communicate well, know the rules and obtain consent. Whether you are a novice or a regular, this article demystifies the libertine experience.

–> Also find our article on how to start libertinism

For a successful evening in a libertine club, no pressure!

To ease the tension associated with the idea of the unknown, consider the libertine club as a night out at a nightclub. In fact, the general atmosphere of a libertine club resembles that of a club: DJ, dance floor, bar, sofas and armchairs, more or less chic decor depending on the standing of the establishment. The environment has something to put you at ease when you enter. You will not have the impression of setting off to discover an unknown land. The classic mistake when starting a first evening, and this, whatever the field, is to fantasize about it. It is this fantasy that gives rise to apprehension, even to anxiety in certain cases

Relax and tell yourself that you are just going to have a drink in a new kind of establishment. Give yourself time to acclimatize to the atmosphere, to feel the atmosphere that surrounds you. Take the time to familiarize yourself with the place and its occupants. Alone or as a couple, libertines come to seek a little relaxation, to let go and, why not, a moment of sexual pleasure. Dance on the dance floor or lean on the bar and sip your cocktail. Sooner or later in the evening, someone is likely to come to meet you, exactly as is the case in a classic nightclub. The only difference here is that if the sexual desire is felt, you are not forced to wait until you get home (or hers or his or theirs) to consummate this ardent desire. You can respond favorably or kindly decline the proposal.

A libertine club is above all a club

Once you have been able to get to know the place and feel more at ease, you can set your sights on the person, couple or group that piques your curiosity. In a libertine club , relationships must remain courteous and elegant . In fact, and even if some evenings there are a lot of single men, no aggression is allowed. Nothing can be forced. The slightest questionable behavior is suppressed by a security team on the lookout. So, don't be afraid to refuse to play if you don't want to or if you don't like the game or the players. You don't have to give any justification. A simple, courteous "no" is enough.

Read the rules of the libertine club to avoid making any mistakes.

Note these few basic rules that are found in all libertine clubs in France , in Paris as in Lyon or Cap d'Agde and everywhere in the provinces (around 250 swingers clubs are listed throughout France):

Whether you are a man, a woman, gender neutral or a libertine couple, Nothing can be imposed on you , not even a caress or a little kiss, otherwise the act is considered sexual assault punishable by heavy penalties. This rule is of course valid in the other direction. Always make sure of the consent of your interlocutor before the slightest gesture.
It's not because you have a libertine soul and a naughty mind that you must feel obliged to consent to one sexual practice or another. You can just watch, as many times as you like. Besides, in a libertine club, an average of a third of the members do nothing.
Determine your tastes . Are you exclusively a swinger? Do you come simply as an exhibitionist to make love with your partner in public? On the contrary, do you come as a voyeur, because watching sex passively excites you a lot? Do you prefer a libertine evening in a sauna or a libertine beach ? Or do you prefer the candaulism, THE side by side, Fetishism or BDSM? Whatever your tastes, let other members who come to meet you know about them during the discussions you have with them.
In the same way, set your limits . No fellatio, no sodomy, no kissing, aversion to some sex positions , no threesomes, straight or gay only, etc. You alone decide what you do with your body. Here, no judgement . Everyone has their limits.

Security in a libertine club

The first safety measure to be able to let go and have fun completely is the emotional and psychological security . As long as nothing is imposed on you, you can go out to a libertine club while being reassured . The ideal for a first outing is to come accompanied by someone more accustomed to this type of establishment to be able to 'camouflage' yourself a little behind your partner while you get to know the place.

Then come the health and hygiene safety aspects. Condoms are mandatory and libertine clubs distribute them free of charge to their members. Finally, last point, all drugs are of course prohibited, including cannabis. For heavy smokers, however, many swingers clubs have a smoking area inside.

Make new connections in a libertine club

Another advantage of libertine clubs is that they allow libertine meetings various and varied and the introduction into private libertine party networks . The more you frequent your favorite libertine or swingers club and the more you will build relationships with its most regular members. Eventually, you will be invited to join private libertine evenings where letting go is at its peak. In this sense, a libertine club allows you to set foot in the deep exploration of your sexuality and to create your own network of trusted people with whom to test new experiences and realize your fantasies, from the softest to the most torrid.

Some practical details to know about swingers clubs

Having set aside these emotional, security, psychological, sexual and even philosophical considerations, let us move on to more practical details.

How much does it cost to enter a libertine club?

Of many libertine clubs offer entry to single women when the rates for unaccompanied men often exceed 80 euros. The clubs are therefore select! On the other hand, during the evenings, each libertine club tries to balance the ratio of men to women within its establishment. And this is true throughout the country, in Paris, Cap d'Agde, Bordeaux or Lyon. The Libertine couples , on the other hand, can sometimes enter for free during special evenings. The average price of an entry for a couple is 50 euros.

Enjoy the many themed evenings organized by libertine clubs

Another point to remember before you decide to cross the doors of a libertine club, they regularly organize theme evenings . If you are a single woman, you will therefore be entitled to exclusive evenings with libertine couples without the presence of single men. For a first time, it might be a good idea! Also note that swingers clubs are increasingly diversifying between:

Libertine sauna and hammam, day and night
Classic libertine club mixing genders and sexual orientations
Specialized libertine club (swingers club, gay, trans or straight club)
Club organizing only private parties by invitation

How are the spaces distributed within a libertine club?

Finally, for those who are wondering how the spaces are distributed within a libertine club, know that as a general rule, the dance floor is separated by more intimate spaces and more naughty. You may, during the evening, be invited to relax in a more secluded alcove allowing you to indulge in pleasures with your partner(s) libertinism

Is there a specific outfit to wear to enter a libertine club?

Let's finish by specifying that there is no real mandatory outfit. Clubs may ask you to wear sexy clothing, but at your convenience. And of course, you are not forced to walk around the club naked. You are free to undress if you feel like it. And wherever you go, never forget that the four pillars of libertinism are:

there freedom (including and especially that of saying no),
there trust ,
THE pleasure (or letting go)
and the sexual consent .

All you have to do is choose your future place of libertine exploration which is best suited to meet people who will give you the sexual experiences you want. Remember that no one can force you to do anything. But remember that everyone (or almost everyone) is potentially likely to reveal you sexually to yourself.

Can joining a swingers club harm your relationship?

Libertine clubs or the swinging practice are not suitable for everyone. Swinging is just one variation of the many activities in the swinging sphere. Consider these places as one of the many ways to explore your intimate life. If the idea appeals to you and your partner and you have discussed it in depth, there is no reason to deprive yourself of it.

It is essential to define some guidelines: is it allowed to kiss, caress, become intimate with others? And in what context?

It is good to have a "safe word" (a pre-established term) to say in case you feel unwell.

Ready to discover the pleasures of libertine clubs?

The world of libertinage, although surrounded by mystery and prejudice, is above all based on respect, courtesy and safety. For those who wish to take the plunge and go to a libertine club, it is imperative to know, understand and respect the rules of these places. Communication and defining personal limits are also important for a successful experience. Freedom of expression, trust, pleasure and consent are the main pillars of libertinage. However, it is crucial to discuss with your partner before embarking on this adventure, to ensure that everyone is comfortable with the decision. Ultimately, libertine clubs offer a unique opportunity to explore and understand your sexuality in a safe and respectful environment. If all of this resonates with you, then you are in the right place, and the adventure of clubs is waiting for you!